Cold Beer, Midnight Trains and Bean Dip

One night my wife and I went over to some close friends house for dinner and drinks. Being a fairly long drive, it was mutually pre-planned that we would spend the night and return home the following day. Dinner was delicious, Bar BQ with all of the trimmings, followed by a few beers, a dip in the pool and then some more beers. We played cards and watched the trains go by. The couple lived in an area next to a railroad line, and me, being a lover of trains, I took great delight in seeing so many trains at such a close proximity.
As the night grew later, everyone was getting tired and ready for bed. Everyone, except for me, that is. I was still anticipating the next train to go by and another beer or two didn’t sound out of the question. The couple assured me that I would be welcome to remain in the back yard and watch the trains and come in whenever I was ready. They only asked that I turn off the light in the backyard because it shined through the window of their bedroom and kept them awake. Having the light off was no problem for me as I like it dark when I sit in the yard at night. The lady of the house told me that if I got hungry just to help myself to any of the snacks that were in the kitchen. The couple retired for the evening, as did my wife, leaving me alone in the back yard, sipping my beer and waiting for the next freight train to pass.
It was a nice South Texas summer night. There was a light breeze, the sky was clear and the moon was shining on the pool in the yard. In between the roar of the occasional train the neighborhood was quiet and tranquil. Even the dogs had gone to bed.
As the night wore on the beers were beginning to have their effect and I needed to visit the rest room. After using the facilities I was exiting the house though the kitchen and I noticed an array of chips on the kitchen table. I thought perhaps a snack before bed would not be a bad idea. There were corn chips, potato chips, tortilla chips etc. and I DID notice earlier seeing a new unopened can of bean dip on the picnic table outside. YES, a midnight snack is just what I needed. I grabbed a bag of the, “Big Dip Fritos” from the table, a fresh beer from the ice chest outside and the can of bean dip from the picnic table outside. I then returned to my train watching spot to await the next passing train and enjoy my snack. I wondered if the train crew ever got to eat this good on their journeys riding the rails around the country.
After settling in, I opened my fresh beer and opened the bag of Fritos and selected a Frito just the perfect size and shape to allow me to get a good scoop of bean dip. The first scoop out of a bean dip can is always the best one. I found the pull tab on the bean dip can and pulled it open and tossed the lid into my little trash can of empty beer bottles. Like a child jumping into a pile on newly raked leaves I plunged my chip into the bean dip and popped it into my mouth.
At that very moment a train sounded it’s horn from around the bend. It was like an alarm warning of some impending danger that I was already aware of. The taste of the bean dip was distinct and pronounced. This was not bean dip, it was cat food. Fish based cat food. I immediately spit it onto the yard and began looking for the garden hose. It was dark and I was panicked. There was no garden hose to be found. I grabbed my beer and tried to wash my mouth out with beer but it wasn’t working. I then ran to the pool and started dipping my head under the water like a duck looking for a fish. Nothing I did would completely remove the taste from my mouth. The neighborhood dogs were now barking, the evenings tranquility was gone and my infatuation for trains had passed like the last Laredo bound Union Pacific. I took the can of cat food and buried it deep in the trashcan and went to bed.
The next morning I woke later than everyone else. I could hear the chatter of friends and family that had arrived for a Sunday brunch. I arose and headed for the bathroom to wash my mouth out one more time and then went to the kitchen for a cup of coffee. Surely some coffee would help. Everyone was gathering on the patio visiting when I went outside and took a seat. The coffee was helping my somewhat dull headache. Our hostess stopped by, greeted me good morning and asked if I would like some brunch. She said “I made some tuna fish sandwiches, If you’d like one.” I politely declined. As she walked away I heard her talking to the family cat. “Are you ready for you dinner kitty? Now where is that cat food? I know I set it out here on the picnic table somewhere.”
I didn’t mention my midnight snack for a long, long time.